are uf students freaky?

tutijaques0
Apr 8
5 min read

Updated: Oct 1

UF students are redefining what it means to be "vanilla"—survey results reveal shifting sexual norms, blurred boundaries, and a growing openness to kink

By Francesca

Credit: YUKO SHIMIZU

Two months ago at Library West, I overheard a conversation at one of those half-tables across from me. Two girls were laughing, clutching each other’s arms, and gasping as they recounted explicit details from the night before. One girl whispered, “He was a freak, though. He’s into some weird stuff.”

Her friend leaned in, intrigued. “How?”

“He choked me.”

Her friend scoffed. “Lucky. Mine was vanilla.”

That response caught my attention—not just what she said, but how she said it, like vanilla was something to be ashamed of. And the way her friend nodded, like she knew exactly what that meant. It made me wonder: since when was choking considered freaky? A lot of my friends would call that vanilla. But what even is vanilla?

It’s a label we throw around, but no one seems to agree on what it actually means. A friend of mine, for example, insisted she had no kinks—yet would ask to be spit on and loved being called a slut in bed. Intrigued by how we classify our own desires, I decided to collect some actual data.

The Research

As part of a class study, I sent out an extensive (and slightly embarrassing) survey titled "How do University of Florida students define and categorize ‘vanilla’ and ‘BDSM’ sexual practices?" to over 100 UF students. My goal was to pinpoint the clearest shared ideas about vanilla sex and discover where the boundaries of "conventional" lie. To ensure a diverse sample, I distributed the survey across five channels spanning majors, ages, and backgrounds.

I received 38 responses—82% from women, which wasn’t surprising. Women, as expected, were much more open to this conversation than men.

Greek Life’s Connection to BDSM

Over half of the participants were involved in Greek life, and within that group, 26% identified as actively engaged in non-vanilla or BDSM practices. In other words, a solid quarter of Greek life isn’t just wearing letters—they’re tying knots.

It raises an interesting question: In a system built on tradition, hierarchy, and rigid gender roles (courting and strict rules), does kink feel like a way to push back? Or does it just fit right in?

But there’s more. Of the 53% of Greek life who cautiously placed themselves in the “Somewhat engaged” category (1-3 encounters with non-vanilla sex), over half went on to label some pretty eyebrow-raising choices as vanilla.

The Expanding Definition of "Vanilla"

The survey began with this question: Below is a list of sexual activities. Select those which you deem as "vanilla." Here is what everyone had to say:

The results were surprising. By definition, vanilla sex excludes acts like spanking, degradation, or pegging, yet multiple respondents classified those as vanilla.

More predictably, acts like foreplay, mutual masturbation, and cowgirl—widely considered mainstream—were overwhelmingly labeled as vanilla. But the fact that spanking, slapping, and even degradation were included suggests that the term vanilla has lost its original meaning. The boundaries are shifting.

How much of our perception of "conventional" is shaped by personal experience, peer influence, and shifting social norms? Even among scholars, there’s no clear consensus on a definition. Four different PhDs could give you four different answers.

Students Had No Trouble Defining "Freaky"

Oral sex stood out. Only one respondent considered it unconventional—a stark contrast to 20 years ago. According to the National Library of Medicine, in 2005, 10.8% of Northeastern students found oral sex "disgusting," and 8.2% found it "strange." Today at UF, 84% of students report engaging in it. What was once a taboo act is now practically expected. Sex educator Ginger Koehler responded with the following quote:

“It’s great that oral sex is more popular, but there’s a clear disparity—women report giving far more than they receive. Blowjobs are seen as a must where cunnilingus is an extra…Oral sex is awesome, but I think the pendulum has swung too far in the other direction and our oral sex culture could use a bit of feminine reform,”

And when oral sex is performed on women, the focus on orgasm is noticeably blurrier than it is for men. As Ginger pointed out, this cultural shift comes from underlying sexism in presumptions. What was once a rare expectation for men has become an unspoken obligation for women.

The Numbers: How Freaky Are UF Students?

Now it’s time for the slightly invasive, yet undeniably interesting, rice purity question: Which sex acts have UF students actually participated in?

Let’s break this down. Only 18% of UF students report engaging in anal play, which is 7% lower than the University of Maryland and a striking 16% behind East Carolina University, according to this study. It seems surveyed UF students aren’t doing anal like everyone else is.

When it comes to threesomes, undergraduate researchers Morris, Chang, and Knox (2017) found that 15% of students at a large southeastern university had experienced one. At UF? Not a single respondent. Maybe Gators are more conservative than we think, or maybe threesomes just aren’t as appealing here.

My guess? Threesomes depend on the third random, and Gainesville isn’t exactly overflowing with options. With only one major four-year university nearby, your pool of strangers is limited. And even at a school this size, you’re bound to run into the guy you almost had a threesome with at least twice a month.

Phone sex, though, is increasingly popular among UF students. With 66% reporting that they’ve participated, Gainesville’s long-distance sex lives seem to be alive and thriving.

And as for double penetration? I made the mistake of googling “college students double penetration” at the library and immediately regretted it. But according to the survey, 12% of UF students claimed they’d participated—higher than I expected, especially since 0% reported participation in a threesome. Either double penetration isn't what people imagine, or hands are working overtime.

So, What’s the Verdict?

UF students might not be the freakiest in the country, but they’re far from prudes. If anything, what we consider “normal” is changing faster than we realize. Once scandalous acts are now shrugged off as casual Tuesday-night behavior. Meanwhile, the line between vanilla and kinky blurs, with students redefining what those words mean.

Maybe the real takeaway here isn’t about what UF students are doing in bed—it’s about how we discuss it. If the way we label sex is constantly shifting, then maybe it’s time to admit there’s no universal definition of “normal” at all. What’s considered tame today might have been taboo 20 years ago, and what seems freaky now could be totally mainstream in another decade.

So, are UF students freaky? Depends on who you ask.

Francesca is an online writer for Rowdy Magazine, describing herself as hauntingly beautiful, effortlessly kind, and humble.